Hello, Winter Break!

Not everything is okay, but I do a damn good job at hiding it. I'm also coping and keeping myself busy with writing and learning new songs.

I haven't been in the best mood lately. I'm just tired, like mentally exhausted. I'm too young to feel this way. I try putting on my best act because 1. it's the holidays and 2. I dont feel like telling anyone what's wrong over and over again like a broken CD.

I've already mastered "Lighters" by Eminem and Bruno Mars and "Written In the Stars" by Tinie Tempah.

I'm supposed to hang out with KC before Christmas, so I guess that would be tomorrow or Friday night.

So far on this winter break, I've been sleeping and learning songs. I'm beginning to breathe music and writing at the same time. It's an awesome feeling. I haven't written in a while.

I've also been sleeping a lot. I guess I'm finally catching up on lost sleep from October haha. Before I "let loose" for break, I do want to do some serious sleeping :)

I cannot wait to get back to writing. I want to write as much as possible during break since I won't have any free time come January 19th.

I also plan on taking 3 courses during the summer. So, I won't have much free time then either. Hopefully, these summer courses will help me catch up on lost time.
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I've come to a weird realization. Guys don't like my personality. Just my boobs and ass, and maybe my face. So, what if I did a mini experiment and dressed like I did this Tuesday?  I wonder how many goddamn motherfucking nods and whistles I would get. All semester, I wore jeans and a hoodie, because it's just school and I usually leave after class right away. No one ever gave me a second glance. All of a sudden, when I decide to dress like a girl [LOL], I get reactions.

In all honesty, I didn't think my top was that revealing and my jeans were that tight, but apparently, they were.

That is so sad. My face is up here, assholes. Why isn't my IQ more intriguing than my cup size?

Once I start my core classes, and take my Final Cut Pro course, I'm going to do a documentary on this. I'll do an actual experiment with an independent variable, dependent variable, and a control group.

Yes, it is technically a compliment and yes it was a bit of a confidence booster, but it is still repulsive. Do not whistle at me. Take your eyes off my tits, and keep on walking.

And unless you have some sort of musical artsy-type talent, there's no chance. Call me shallow, whatever. I cannot "click" with someone who does not understand the art of writing or music. Sorry.
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I'm not in the mood for whistles. Maybe I'll stick with scrubbin' it next semester. Next fall is when I'll be able to do my core classes. And that's when I'll do my experiment.